drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
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