no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Randomize
