I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
