I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize
