I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
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