That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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