when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
Farmville is her only friend.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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