so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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