I don't usually arrange sex via text message
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
Holy sore nipples Batman
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Randomize
