I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Randomize
