ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
