were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
