My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
