i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
