Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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