I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
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