Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize