Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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