There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
