I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
