The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
