there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
