that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
