do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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