i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
