My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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