I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
My boob is missing a layer of skin
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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