Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
Randomize