dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
