it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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