who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
I take back everything I said about communal showers
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
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