with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
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