I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
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