Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
i think im in europe. pls send help
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
