I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
3pm strippers are depressing
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize