i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
