She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
