hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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