i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Randomize
