If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize