Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
I think my moral compass just broke
Randomize
