I wish I could punch you in the face.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
