go do what you do best...puke behind churches
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
