Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
