And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
