Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Randomize
