He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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