make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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