Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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