Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
But we have bathrooms and they dont
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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