two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
